Tuesday, 7 August 2012

Getting Offended - A Perception

గురు బ్రహ్మ గురుర్ విష్ణుః గురుర్ దేవో మహేశ్వరః
గురు స్సాక్షాత్ పరబ్రహ్మ తస్మై శ్రీ గురవే నమః

శుక్లాం బరధరం విష్ణుం శశివర్ణం చతుర్భుజం
ప్రసన్న వదనం ధ్యాయేత్ సర్వ విఘ్నోప శాంతయే

శ్రుతి స్మృతి పురాణానాం ఆలయం కరుణాలయం
నమామి భగవత్ పాదం శంకరం లోక శంకరం

ఓం నమః శివాయ

After the darshan of Lord Shiva at Amarnath, by Gods grace I felt like having the darshan of Maata Vaishno Devi as well. So from Baltal (One of the base camps for Amarnath Yatra), one has to go to Katra (foothill of Vaishno devi mountain). In one van like a Tata Sumo or a Chevy Tavera 8 people plus driver travel. So, we were talking to one guy whose van already had 5 people. We (Two of us) were pushing him not to look for another person so that we can go relatively comfortably. From the place where the discussions happen to the actual location of the van, the distance would be around 200-300 meters.
Finally the driver agreed to go with 7 passengers and asked a person beside him to take us to the van. My co-traveler asked me to hand over one of the pieces of my luggage to him so that I can walk easily. With great hesitation I handed over the luggage to this person who looked like the assistant of the driver. He took us to the van and we got into the van. After the driver arrived the man who helped me with my luggage also got into the van beside me.

A shock went through my spine and I wanted to confirm it. I asked him, “Are you also a passenger traveling in this to Katra?”

He answered, “Ya, I am also a passenger but I will not be traveling till Katra. I will get down half way to Katra.
Hearing that I felt very guilty and felt ashamed of myself.

I said, “My sincere apologies to you. I did not that you were a passenger. The driver took a luggage piece from my colleague and asked you to show the van to us and so we mistook you.”

He responded, “Apologies for what?” He had a sincere question in his tone.

I said, “Without knowing that you are passenger and thinking that you are with the driver I handed over one of my bags to you. I am very sorry about that.”

I was feeling extremely bad for offending him like that.

He said, “What is the big deal about that. Anyway, I was not carrying anything and so what is wrong with helping you out by carrying one of your luggage pieces?”

For a moment I put myself in his shoes. If at all some idiot like me asked me to carry a luggage, my best possible response would have been, “I am also a passenger like you. In case you need help, you ask me for help and I will probably help you. I am not related to the driver in any way.”

I honestly did not intend to offend him, but if I were him I would have certainly conveyed to him the reality at the least.

From this incident I learnt two things
1.    Its not that someone humiliates/insults/offends you. People can only attempt at humiliating/insulting/offending you. Whether you actually get humiliated or not is within you. Its your perspective. Its your mindset.
2.    It is not important for you to ensure that people know you. If they have to know you, they will come to know about you without you telling them. If they do not know about you, then either you do not deserve to known to them or they do not deserve to know about you.

Lord shiva definitely ensured that I learn a proper lesson for my life and I really hope that I implement it and reach the stage of this friend of mine from Kashmir.


I did not ask him his name intentionally as I wanted to remember him as Ramban (place where he lives) friend.

This guy is a professional Palanquin bearer (called doli there – to carry people to the amaranth cave from the base camps). He comes to Baltal every year to do that job and make some money. Makes 2-3 trips every day, when he is on job.
He said, “Whats the big deal in 4 people carrying one person?”
Apparently, his legs never cause any pain inspite of carrying that load to the mountain so many times in a day, every day.

సర్వే జనాః సుఖినో భవంతు

PS: There could be typos and other mistakes in telugu and english, kindly pardon me with big hearts.

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